walked the sand with the crustaceans

ok. so where was i.

i'm gonna try and make this flow... it's not like so much has happened but it has.

first things first - after my visit monday and i bought said pants and an awesome japanese superheroes tshirt - i put my newly acquired jeans away (thanks jdg again) in my closet.

these are my favorite pants - i love them all. i thought about it but i really did need the new jeans i got at uo from jdg... they are cut higher - kinda high-rise. not really "me" but definitely worth having.

and my best friend.

you know moving to the country and living here for two years now has given me so many gifts - one and i'm quoting the dude in modest mouse that moved back to this area is that you can live here and work at walmart, be a waitress or construct stuff and have a chance at the american dream. you don't need to have a lot of money to be happy.

and i can take that attitude with me to richmond - i might even cash this stupid divorce check one day.

i didn't think i was going to get to work today at all - and then i got called in early. so life is good.

lemme tell how good.

i bumped into a kindred soul on the ba chat. it's strange but in a good way. we were watching streaming porn (sexandsubmission stuff) and i gotta tell you - i had a really good time. he got that shit to stream onto my computer through skype and i watched some stuff that i wish i could've in the past. ah - but watching it with a dude - i don't care how many miles away was a new (cool) experience. i even made out with some software - all i asked bm for was a porn subscription.

i'm glad i got my own.

while i'm bringing up the ba.com chat - i will say one thing - it is NO different than meeting your best friend or husband on the internet in usenet groups in the mid-nineties (feel me). i mean i may be geeky but i'm def ahead of the curve with this kinda stuff.

trust me.

i am not doing anything tonight - i actually am happy about all that.

i got a bag of pork rinds - and dragon drink. i thought i'd splurge on the pork rinds (calorically speaking).

should we go to new year's pasts where i actually socialized - instead of just hording my own pills or methadone or dilaudid - and everything else. but one of the last new years partys i hosted i think *?* i took a baby monitor with me two floors up and left my son (less than a year old) alone.

and thought i was the mom of the year for checking on him often.

or even having my drunken cousins checking on him.

or drunken husband.

and then ingesting 30,000 calories of food and alcohol - and then puking all of it up but still weighing five pounds more the next day.

i'm exhausted just thinking about it.

nick invited me to watch the ufc fight this weekend - i think i'm staying home.