one more look and i forget everything

so.

that didn't end well.

tj and i had an argument that lasted most of the night... i left the beach - left him at his parents house and he's renting a car to come back here.  for practical reasons! he has stuff here and his flight leaves out of richmond - plus who wants to drive all the way back with your parents.
so he argued with the rental car company about a gas-guzzler of a h3 - saying he would not endorse a car that was made for war and too many of his friends died in a war for gas - so - i kinda had a lump in my heart and knew i made a terrible mistake.

hopefully i can apologize enough but i know in the bottom of my heart i'm still not sure.  but until i am - i gotta hold on to that feeling.
and this is hard - but i wrote jlm - i bought (rented?) a po box (2964) here in chesterfield (va) - and wrote and told him that ten years toooooooo thhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeee ddddddaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy that i last saw him he was on my mind and he was in my soul and in my skin.  
and every single cell of this primitive woman - but my soul - is just a girl waiting for her prince charming!

please show yourself.

getting ready for one prince to arrive - one that's obviously in california - one that has stayed away too long and one that can't put me before one pill - and four that are soaking up the rays and being nuts..... all of them just outta reach.
i need meds.