she told me i'd meet girls like you

there are a million things i need to do tomorrow.

one of them is getting some sun.

i am going to take a little bit of time to soak up the sun - and possibly add some color to my pasty body.

i have not been shopping yet. honest to god.

there's a belt buckle i want and i wouldn't having more v-neck white tshirts (my 2010 staple) - but other than that i have plenty of everything.

i am taking the daughter of a friend out shopping (wednesday) to a couple thrift stores and then lunch but other than that i have no immediate plans to spend money.

and nothing for nothing but to mock me for liking to shop is like me mocking bm for playing videogames. why the fuck do you care? nobody on this blog lives with me and i don't really need to explain myself to anyone anyway - so fuck it.

i do pray for those of you still addicted - just because you don't have consequences from your addiction doesn't mean you're getting away with it. i can remember, for this addict, thinking and praying i could stop - convincing myself i could go *this long* - then i'd end up high and wonder what the fuck happened?

i was a slave to it and the point is freedom.

this morning the first thought outta my head wasn't what i'm going to - or where will i get it from - nor was it the last thing i thought about last night. if the program gives me just that - i would never be able to repay it.

the best way i could describe the whirlwind with the house. is just that.

someone wants me to take advantage of this house credit - but i think i need to rethink what eight grand is worth as far as serenity.

in the spirit of not having any more decent porn after friday - i torrented some publicdisgrace - and good god i love that site. i think that free porn turning into free porn will be a smooth transition afterall.