stealing in the name of the lord

i'm seeing the kids tomorrow and shit - but i miss my house.

while at work last night the original youngster that was asking me out - and he was too short for even me - asked me if while i was in richmond if i was back with my husband! i said no fucking way - and he asked if i wanted someone to keep me company and i was like well i just recently had company and it wasn't that good - so maybe.

and just then i remembered my promise to jesus and mary and thought if just talking about having company is wrong and just the very thought that i thought that having company was wrong proved it was wrong and i hurried and shuffled off.

not before he said he gave really good company.

this is gonna be tough.

immediately after work i'm going to richmond - i miss my house. i picked up a new haan steamer to do all the tile i have in the kitchen and bathroom and i love it.  before i went out and bought a new cover for it i decided to crochet one - so i did that last night - now i gotta go home and try it out.  i might wait till sunday till after the kids destroy my place tomorrow.

and even though just typing that my ocd made my fingers tingle - i can get through it for the sake of the kids.  

i started to crochet this scarf-type thing called a juliana wrap - i'm making it out of a real pretty cornflower yellow and almost a light grass green - i got the yolk part of the scarf done but the mesh part is next - NIGHTMARE - but i have plenty o'time on my hands - yeah right.  not having a real job makes everyone think you have all this time - but trust - i do not.

between seeing the kids so much and seeing doctors - oh yeah fucking meetings - i'm seriously wiped out by the end of the day.

goal: this week to take it more slow - oh yeah - edit:

goal for the week starting tuesday: take it more slow and learn time management better - and keep you mind off boys and your house clean and go to meetings and finish your scarf and start group therapy then look for a dog then think seriously about how a dog would make traveling except when you go places that are dog friendly and then hike dead rock maybe bring zakkary then get zakkary's hair cut then go back to bedford for the 23rd though the 27th for fill in work don't forget to hang out with nikki while i'm there and i thought i could fucking relax.

whatever.

edit: nervous breakdown.