And when that fog horn blows I want to hear it

nothing like van morrison to make me see what i want and need.

i don't have to hide the fact that i wanna get back on the horse.

sure - it would've been ideal to wait the year to see if i was ready. i think, tho, what i want and what is here - is the same.

i know what can happen - my heart broken again - but gahlee - it's worth it.

the way i feel today can't be described and i can't imagine today without it.

...i've got my back against the record machine

i'll be appearing at my church every wednesday (for three weeks and then every other wednesday) as a liturgy reader. And fuck me sideways - I fucked up already. Practicing for the 'church lady' I said from a letter to the theologians instead of letter to the thessalonians. so i'm pretty sure that isn't what got me the job. regardless - i wasn't told about my tattoos, nor anything else. AND the church lady knew I was coming from my meeting so that wasn't even held against me.

so besides church and school and maybe even a baby job everything is going smoothly.

don't get me wrong - fuck ups appear all over. like sunday night - but I DID NOT let that shit get to me. hell no. sure i was shook up for a minute but two really good friends told me exactly what i needed to hear and well - it's all gravy since.

as a matter of fact - i think the thing i'm waiting for is here - i just wanna seriously take my time. it's that good. i'm serious.